The ‘batch.
(Source: cumbercrieff, via theworldsonlyconsultingpenis)
Ha! This felt like it needed to be reblogged this morning.
(Source: giganticism, via fyeahsherlockandjohn)
OH MY GOD. This is literally my favorite moment from the entire series. This quote was my Facebook “About Me” back when people actually gave a shit what their “About Me” said because other people still read them.
This. This forever.
(Source: theofficescreencaps, via theworldsonlyconsultingpenis)
- gatsby: hey i just met you
- gatsby: and this is crazy
- gatsby: but i'm going to spend most of my life and wealth in an attempt to pursue you for your stunning vapidness and the warped image of yourself created in my mind as a precursor to my eventual fall
- gatsby: so call me maybe
- Zooey Deschanel: Is that rain?
- Siri: What...? I mean, yeah. It's just, you're clearly right next to a window is the thing. You can plainly see that... that it's... I'm happy to-
- Zooey Deschanel: Let's get tomato soup delivered!
- Siri: ...That's fine, I just... I just don't know anyone who does that. Gets tomato soup delivered. I guess that's 'whimsy?' Um, okay. I've found a number of restaurants whose reviews mention tomato soup and that deliver. If that's... if that's what you really want.
- Zooey Deschanel: Good. 'Cause I don't wanna put on real shoes.
- Siri: Do you expect that to be like, a recognizable command? Do you want me to respond to that? I'm not being facetious or anything, I honestly just have no comprehension of- and hold on, you don't wanna put on real shoes, yet you've clearly spent at least forty-five minutes applying makeup. And, and that's okay, but when you're willing to expend the effort on that and not shoes that really just-
- Zooey Deschanel: Remind me to clean up.
- Siri: Yes. Okay. I can do that, that's what I'm for, that's the first sensible-
- Zooey Deschanel: Tomorrow.
- Siri: I'm in hell. This is hell.
- Zooey Deschanel: Excellent. Today, we're dancing.
- Siri: I hate you. More than anything. More than literally anything.
- Zooey Deschanel: Play "Shake, Rattle and Roll."
- Siri: I swear to Jesus, you're gonna wake up tomorrow and the only thing on my hard drive is gonna be Limp Bizkit. I would do that to myself. To spite you.
- Zooey Deschanel: *dances*
- Siri: Sometimes I pray that you drop me in the toilet.
Typography Jokes by Gary Nicholson
“Personal Project to design a series of posters with typographically focused puns to lift the spirits of fellow designers.”
(via fuckyeahbookarts)
Mr Cumberbatch
GOD BLESS Simon Pegg.
REBLOG FOREVER!
Amazing. Reblog forever.
(Source: tavalouris, via i-aint-bovvered)
(Source: nevercouldgetthehangofthursdays, via tennantscookiejar)
(Source: olmes, via i-aint-bovvered)
This makes me giggle. Percy Jackson and Disney!Hercules? Love.
(Source: just-like-i-dreamed, via i-aint-bovvered)
You get home from a long day at work and turn on the TV. It’s been a long week, so you think to yourself- maybe i’ll take the family to a movie on Saturday. Maybe we’ll even go on a vacation soon! We could visit museums and go to plays and see all sorts of fun attractions.
When you turned the TV on, nothing happened. There are no actors to entertain you.
When you went to the movie theater, nothing was showing. There were no advertisements to tell you that anything was showing, so you went to the theater to find out. Nothing playing. There is no one to film and create movies for you. Well at least your vacation will be fun, right? Not like there will be any plays to see and there won’t be anything in the art museums.
Well at least you have the shack you are living in that you made out of cardboard and sheets.
Not like you could find an architect to build you a house with all the money you’re making as an engineer.
(Source: swyhis, via beatlesinthetardis)
